I want my FIT TV

I have started to exercising again, outside the pool.  We have AT&T Uverse and in looking for FIT TV I stumbled across a Fit 360 on demand video.  It has three different programs.  One for cardio.  One for weight lifting and the last, Yoga (of course).  I flip through the descriptions and decide that cardio should be day one.  Why not I should be able to tackle it the information says it's only 22 minutes.  I find my tennies and some stretchy clothes.  Hit play and the instructor comes to life on the tube.  She talks about how we will be meshing cardio with some weights.  5 or 8 lbs are recommended. 

Darn.

I hit pause.  Where are those weights I bought for Brandon when he started carrying cymbals his freshman year?  15min later, success.

I return to the TV hit play.

And we will be on the floor for some floor exercises.

Pause.

Where is that yoga mat I got for a birthday present from Traci a few years ago?  10 min later success.

Back to the TV hit play.

We warm up jumping rope.  Luckily we are using an imaginary rope or I'd have to hit pause yet again.  I pretend mine is a fire rope.  We are jumping 'rope' when a count down clock shows up in the corner of the screen.

Cool!

 I can see how far I have come or got to go. 

Jump, jump jump. "We are working the heart right now warming up the muscles."  Ah ya right it's getting pretty hot in her.   I jump over to the fire place insert and turn the blower off.  She halts the jumping and shows a new move.  Reverse lung a couple of bounces and jump in the air to switch legs.   After about 3 reps I am ready to switch legs with her.  Mine are burning up. I lung over to the window and pop it open a smidgen.
On to jumping jacks.  I remember these from school.  I just don't remember my knees feeling like someone is sticking a knife in them.
I check the count down clock.

16:34.

REALLY?
3 and a half minutes.
Next we lean how to do squats, stepping sideways, back and forth.  I squat to the window and push it all the way up.

On to the floor.  Oh here is where we use the weights.  Learn how to do the butterfly movement.  Whee.  I am a beautiful butterfly.    But it's getting a bit cold.  Wish I hadn't pushed that window up so far.  Whoops we are doing sit ups with the weights.  That's a new one for me. 
Time to get up and do some more imaginary jumping rope.

13:00 

Ugh.  I thought I was going to like that clock but it's not moving very  much.  I watch it while we are squatting again. This time with weights.  Yippee!  It seems to be working correctly.  I inch closer to the window so my legs and rear can cool off.  Jumping jacks.  Why did Jack get an exercise named after him.  What about Jill?  Did she get anything?  Oops supposed to be doing those lunges with the weights.  Where did I put those?  Should be around here some where. 5lbs don't just roll away. 

11:00 

Will this work out ever end?
It's an endless rotation of  Jack jumping Jill, someone lunging out of the night, jumping rope with a candlestick, sit up and downs. and pretty butterflies.

5:00

Where does the time go?  I think it might be time for a cool down.  OH wait one more time around.
Now! it's time for a cool down.
We stretch and breath and then it's over.  The little clock says
0:00
 and it's time for my new friend to leave me drenched in sweat and shaking.  I shut the window, stumble outside and collapse in the snow.  Steam engulfs me and I lay there until my wet clothes tell me it's time to go in.
And the 22 minute work out only took 47 minutes.